What makes a family a family? Recently this question has been causing conflict in Western society as societal norms have increasingly been challenged in the ongoing culture war. The Anglo-Saxon world view in specific constituting the “Anglo-sphere” has at its core foundation the typical Protestant Biblical world view of a family that comes directly from Genesis 2:24 as follows:
“Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they both shall be one flesh.”
From this solitary verse we can gather the necessity of monogamy, independence, and distinct male headship over the nuclear family. From this worldview we tend to have an individual un-egalitarian nuclear family structure in each household. People tended to move away from their family to start a new family. A new family supported themselves economically by not sharing housing with parents or siblings. Though the father is considered the head of the house, he was not generally authoritarian when it came to the decisions of his adult children. There was no tier system of hierarchy where the oldest son dominated the rest of the family in decisions and inheritance once the father passed on. From this mindset came the great expansive spirit to settle new lands, bold risk-taking, bold creativity, innovation, and adaptation to challenges on a great scale. In “Protestant” Christianity this led to great freedom of choice within interpretation of the Bible through different denominations for better or for worse. In the West in general this also led to freedom of choices with multiple religions and opposing ideas as opposed to one core identity that could not be questioned.
All of these characteristics are what we traditionally in the “Anglo-sphere” understand and accept. Even outside of this within the Western world (Latin America, Catholic Europe, Protestant Europe, Slavic Countries, etc.) there are many similarities and core traits that allow us to understand each other easily. For this reason in the West we also have the tenancy to be able to accept the gospel in a much easier way. However, there were also weaknesses with one being that many became so individualistic as to ignore the group completely by embracing a form of rebellion against the system. (Think counter-culture 1960s era thinking.) No system is without its weakness. Even today in more urban areas people in general in the West are moving away from the traditional nuclear family understanding.
However, what if your core idea of a family is not bound by these Western ideas? What if your idea of family comes from Confucianism rather than the Bible? Take this quote for instance:
“There are three degrees of filial piety. The highest is being a credit to our parents, the second is not disgracing them; the lowest is being able simply to support them.” - Confucius
In Japan, the ancient tradition of filial-piety still strongly influences society. At the head of the family is the father who traditionally makes all of the important decisions including who their children marry and what they will do for work. The eldest son is to inherit this role as family retainer and must take it seriously without personal choice once his father passes away. The father is in turn subservient to the larger group community in his area or greater family if he moves to an urban area. These families were registered with the local Buddhist temple for legitimacy. For the Japanese for hundreds of years group loyalty guaranteed survival on an island with limited resources and the inward thinking mindset that it developed. In this filial-piety system, the young were to serve their parents, often living together in the same house, which became particularly hard for a new daughter-in-law coming into a new group having to obey her mother-in-law in a servant-like capacity. Rather than leave and cleave, children were to stay and obey. Marriage was based upon continuing the family unit (clan), not necessarily choice or love. Arranged marriages were the norm for hundreds of years. Only after World War Two were the introduction of the nuclear family and Western ideas of marriage popularized leading to a weakening of the traditional filial piety system. To this day many Japanese are confused as to what system they should embrace. From these few examples we can see some radical differences in the understanding of the family unit.
Why does all of this matter? In more ways than one when a Japanese person is introduced to the truth of the gospel they have to consider what impact it will have upon their filial-piety oriented family structure, which is especially powerful in rural areas. They are taught to consider the will of the group before the will of the self. If they go home and tell their father that they are now Christian they often times are disowned believing that they bring great shame to their family as well as the community for going against the ancient traditional belief system as well as parents wishes. Shame and loss of group connections is the ultimate source of pain and rejection in this system. Japanese people are taught from a young child that pleasing the group wishes is the ultimate measure of happiness. To go against this system is to cease to be Japanese. It is also a reason why Japanese Christians tend to be secretive, not evangelistic, and often times turn inward when it comes to their churches. Japanese churches tend to become a filial-piety oriented buddy system based upon culture rather than biblical example since they often times are overwhelmingly influenced by their world. If they do live by the biblical model they are often shamed by society at large as well as actively shamed from other church members who still retain the deeply rooted filial-piety system mindset. This mindset hinders the spread of the gospel as well as the planting of new churches, which may be one of the reasons why the growth of the gospel is slow here. If Westerners are hesitant to allow their kids to spread the gospel elsewhere, how do you think those living under the filial-piety system will feel about their children spreading the gospel? Becoming ministers? Often times in general Japanese know that the gospel is true, however they are just afraid to accept it because of the dire consequences that they perceive it will bring them. To many they would rather lose their own soul and gain the only world that they have ever known and were taught to embrace as the key to happiness. However, for those who wish to reject the world and obey God there is always great reward. Often times dedicated Japanese Christian families are some of the most spiritual, sacrificial, and dedicated people out there due to their up-bringing. Their respect as well as obedience to God is great. We in the West could learn from these type of Christians. Pray for Japan and Japanese Christians to fight the power of the world's influence in their lives.
